In Lean In: Women, Work, and The Will To Lead, Sheryl Sandberg discusses seeking and speaking our truth. She expresses hope that someday the expression of authentic emotion can in fact identify natural leaders. Recently, I took a break from writing because I was afraid to write about the experiences I had been having. Even in the workplace I was afraid to discuss them. Coworkers and friends saw me teared up for many days over the past two months and inquired why. There were times where I either broke down or came close to doing so when I normally would not have.
At this point, what I am willing to say is that someone close to me passed away and someone close to me desired to die. In the two months that I experienced these two very serious things, I also gained a promotion at work, watched a good friend get married, another friend had a baby, a niece was on the verge of arrival, I continued the best relationship of my life, and enjoyed a 10 day vacation (just to name a few positive experiences). We often hear others say that life is about balance and while I believe that to be true, sometimes experiences remove that balance for a period of time. Are we more vulnerable to judgment when we are off balance? Absolutely.
What most people are not willing to admit is that the line between our personal and professional lives is often blurred. We are encouraged to keep them separate and to not be vulnerable at work. I was encouraged when I read about choosing authenticity over perfection and showing up with your whole self. To build meaningful relationships with other human beings, we have to share the meaningful parts of ourselves. We must be empathetic, honest, and vulnerable.
Barbara Kingsolver says that "the very least you can do in your life is to figure out what to hope for. And the most you can do is live inside that hope".
I hope that I can continue to exist in places of vulnerability without judgement. I hope that the whole me can show up most of the time and be accepted. I hope that I am able to share the most meaningful parts of myself with benefit to myself and others. I hope that my authentic communication and my truth makes me the natural leader I long to be and that all of my efforts serve to positively benefit others.
Ms. Bhakti Mary
I am an optimistic, positive, generous and driven author who is passionate about self-improvement.
The essence of who you are does not lie in the past. What matters is what you are willing to do NOW. You are the presence.